Friday, June 29, 2018

Friday Run-on Parentheticals

Three of the people whom I am closest to ["whom I am" is the correct grammatical construction because whom is the objective case though it sounds terrible, but I am compelled to use the correct case because Mrs. Matthews (English) and Miss Sturies (Latin) would otherwise give me a bad grade that would follow me through high school and hurt my GPA and prevent me from getting into the college of my choice, thereby ruining the rest of my life] had their birthdays this week.

The good news is that I can get shopping and visits to the Post Office out of the way in one fell swoop (just like the mandibularly challenged pull all four wisdom teeth out at the same time which happened to me in my late teens by a dentist who was an ex-G.I. who went easy on the novocaine but in those days we boys were supposed to be tough and not simper like the kids do these days at the slightest twinge), but the bad news is that I can't use "I forgot your birthday" as an excuse because they all know each other.

Happy Birthday, Mom!

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