Think We're Here to Serve YOU?

For two years Juanita the duck was "a beloved mascot and friend to all at the Bello Gardens assisted-living home on Mariposa Avenue in San Anselmo."

When she flew a short distance away, Juanita was turned in to the WildCare rescue center, where she has remained for 28 days.

federal rules say stray ducks are wild animals until proved otherwise. The law, they [at WildCare] say, prohibits Juanita from being reunited with the two dozen bereaved, heartsick and moping senior citizens at Bello Gardens.

[Juanita] is not going anywhere until the U.S. government makes up its mind whether she is a pet duck, a wild duck, a lost duck or simply a misunderstood duck.

It's easy to see why bureaucrats are taking their time: once human happiness is allowed into consideration, what other rules will crumble? And having to answer awkward questions at annual performance reviews can be such a bother.

From 8/20: Seven ducks in a box.

[In retrospect we were fortunate that we didn't involve government or non-profit agencies in our own duck-rescue efforts.]